I am really hating myself right now. I've had a mixed week, I've been good with all my main meals (weekend excluded), but I have had far too much chocolate. I'm finding that hard to let go if I'm honest.
But, I wasn't entirely sure that I had been bad enough to have seen what I saw this morning.
GAIN - 1.5KG
Shit.
Bollocks.
Fuck.
I'm really upset with myself. Why can't I get my fat arse out and walking of a morning? Why can't I resist the urge to buy a piece of chocolate when I go into a shop?
So, that means in almost 8 weeks, I have lost a grand freaking total of just 3.3kgs. That's nothing, less than 500 grams a week.
This week, I really must be more dedicated. I want to lose 3kgs next week to make up for it.
I really really really am hating myself right now.
But, then why am I so surprised? Did I really think that a couple of lentil curries and salads would make up for the junk I ate at the weekend or the chocolates I ate during the week? I guess I had kind of deluded myself into thinking that. I used to not think at all about what I ate, and have maintained the weight I am now for the best part of a decade I guess. So, I figured given that I have changed sooooo much, I would still lose. Naive. Stupid. Fucked up.
Urgh.
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